Meanwhile...
August is traditionally the leanest month, both on sales and news for media organisations. The broadsheets deal with this by using any old crap they can get their hands on, usually surveys or research which otherwise would have been left out in the cold. The Guardian today reports on a study involving youths in the United States by the RAND Corporation, which comes to the conclusion that those who listen to music with "raunchy" lyrics have sex earlier. Almost certainly bollocks, as it ignores everything other than the individual's music taste, but it fills some space up.
For the tabloids, things are a bit different. Even with a war going on in the Middle East, August provides an opportunity for them to retreat and stare at their navels, examining in detail their own individual obsessions and beliefs. Today's papers are a prime example of this in action.
The Mail and Express then leap at the chance given to them by the Local Government Association. In a letter to the Home Secretary, the body expresses concern that failure to properly monitor the number of legal migrants coming to the country from the EU may lead to a rise in council tax, due to additional funding needed for the services the migrants use not being forthcoming.
What the Mail and Express want you to think is that these people are purely coming here to "skive" - when in fact the LGA in its letter points out how many migrants have registered themselves in Slough for national insurance payments. It's certainly by no means a country wide problem either, although 25 councils think they may have problems, which isn't a tiny number by any stretch of the imagination. Nowhere does the letter suggest that they're struggling to cope, as the Express claims - the furthest it goes is "there are a number of local authorities for whom the current system of measuring the number of migrants in specific council areas is failing to ensure adequate funding to keep council services to local people maintained." Now this is out in the open though, it's bound to be used as a useful scapegoat for overspending or ill-calculating councils for when the rises are announced, migrants or not, which will probably lead to more council tax "martyrs", like Josephine Rooney being given publicity by the bastions of Middle England.
The Sun goes with the story of the convicted paedophile Leslie Ford-Thrussell, whose former house and garden police are planning to excavate, after allegations in a letter that there are two children buried there. The paper links Fred West in, even though he killed at least 12 people, and only one of his victims was under the age of ten. Above that, the paper reports on the "crisis" engulfing Big Brother. The Star goes with the same thing, although inevitably illustrates the story with a photograph of Nikki, her modesty only protected by her hair. The complaints have poured in after the producers of the show had the brilliant idea of bringing back a whole bunch of already evicted housemates - which the watchers of the show had already paid money to get rid of through their phone/text voting.
It's rather difficult to feel sorry or have much sympathy for those complaining. After all, the whole show is manipulated and a con to begin with; the most likeable characters are identified in the first week/s of the show, while the others become demonised by the show's producers in order to increase the tension inside the house and to get the morons who watch it passionate enough about what's going on to actually participate in the evictions. If you're stupid enough to watch a show which features the absolute dregs of modern society and complain when you personally get shafted by a show that shafts almost everyone foolish enough to go on it, then you deserve what you get.
Speaking of which, there's something incredibly creepy about Nikki, the Series 6 poster girl, despite being as dull as dishwater both mentally and physically. (She's also surgically enhanced of course, and since being evicted she has appeared in a state of undress for both Nuts and Zoo, despite saying in the house that she wouldn't). It's the eyes: in all the photographs of her there is absolutely nothing behind them. It's like staring into a dark abyss, which then in turn starts to swallow you into it, trying to steal your soul to replace the one she was born without. The worrying thing is that something demonic will fill the void, resulting in Nikki masturbating with a crucifix and projectile vomiting everywhere, although seeing as other ex-Big Brother female contestants have gone into soft pornography, that might be tempting fate.
Finally then, the Mirror continues to bore the entire country with yet more talk of McCartney n' Mills' split, as they seem to be following every twist and turn after revealing the break-up to start with. Quite frankly, who gives a fuck?
For the tabloids, things are a bit different. Even with a war going on in the Middle East, August provides an opportunity for them to retreat and stare at their navels, examining in detail their own individual obsessions and beliefs. Today's papers are a prime example of this in action.
The Mail and Express then leap at the chance given to them by the Local Government Association. In a letter to the Home Secretary, the body expresses concern that failure to properly monitor the number of legal migrants coming to the country from the EU may lead to a rise in council tax, due to additional funding needed for the services the migrants use not being forthcoming.What the Mail and Express want you to think is that these people are purely coming here to "skive" - when in fact the LGA in its letter points out how many migrants have registered themselves in Slough for national insurance payments. It's certainly by no means a country wide problem either, although 25 councils think they may have problems, which isn't a tiny number by any stretch of the imagination. Nowhere does the letter suggest that they're struggling to cope, as the Express claims - the furthest it goes is "there are a number of local authorities for whom the current system of measuring the number of migrants in specific council areas is failing to ensure adequate funding to keep council services to local people maintained." Now this is out in the open though, it's bound to be used as a useful scapegoat for overspending or ill-calculating councils for when the rises are announced, migrants or not, which will probably lead to more council tax "martyrs", like Josephine Rooney being given publicity by the bastions of Middle England.
The Sun goes with the story of the convicted paedophile Leslie Ford-Thrussell, whose former house and garden police are planning to excavate, after allegations in a letter that there are two children buried there. The paper links Fred West in, even though he killed at least 12 people, and only one of his victims was under the age of ten. Above that, the paper reports on the "crisis" engulfing Big Brother. The Star goes with the same thing, although inevitably illustrates the story with a photograph of Nikki, her modesty only protected by her hair. The complaints have poured in after the producers of the show had the brilliant idea of bringing back a whole bunch of already evicted housemates - which the watchers of the show had already paid money to get rid of through their phone/text voting.It's rather difficult to feel sorry or have much sympathy for those complaining. After all, the whole show is manipulated and a con to begin with; the most likeable characters are identified in the first week/s of the show, while the others become demonised by the show's producers in order to increase the tension inside the house and to get the morons who watch it passionate enough about what's going on to actually participate in the evictions. If you're stupid enough to watch a show which features the absolute dregs of modern society and complain when you personally get shafted by a show that shafts almost everyone foolish enough to go on it, then you deserve what you get.
Speaking of which, there's something incredibly creepy about Nikki, the Series 6 poster girl, despite being as dull as dishwater both mentally and physically. (She's also surgically enhanced of course, and since being evicted she has appeared in a state of undress for both Nuts and Zoo, despite saying in the house that she wouldn't). It's the eyes: in all the photographs of her there is absolutely nothing behind them. It's like staring into a dark abyss, which then in turn starts to swallow you into it, trying to steal your soul to replace the one she was born without. The worrying thing is that something demonic will fill the void, resulting in Nikki masturbating with a crucifix and projectile vomiting everywhere, although seeing as other ex-Big Brother female contestants have gone into soft pornography, that might be tempting fate.
Finally then, the Mirror continues to bore the entire country with yet more talk of McCartney n' Mills' split, as they seem to be following every twist and turn after revealing the break-up to start with. Quite frankly, who gives a fuck?
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